Part of the fun of being a girl is getting to experiment with wildly different, totally transformative beauty looks—say, topknot buns or glittery makeup—but occasionally, it can be entertaining to hear a male perspective. We went straight to Christopher DiScipio, a writer at JackThreads and dude with a way-above-average sense of style, to get his honest thoughts on 10 fall beauty trends. While his opinion won’t stop us from trying neon eye shadow, maybe, just maybe, we’ll consider shelving that look on a first date.
Scroll down to see DiScipio’s hilarious take on 10 major fall beauty trends.
The trend: Metallic eye shadow
His take: “Kerry's strongest facial feature (along with her lips) is those big hazelnut eyes that draw you in and make you forget what she was talking to you about. (If you're a lucky enough person to be talking to Kerry Washington in the first place, that is.) The eye shadow enhances her trance-like gaze and gives it an even deeper reach.”
The trend: High ponytail & glittery eye makeup
His take: “The ponytail errs on the side of disheveled—like when you do your hair for a night out, go to bed at 4 a.m., and wake up without ever brushing or washing it out. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, because it gives off a youthful vibe. RiRi's makeup artist will probably have glitter specks all over her for the next week or so, but her client definitely turned a few heads with the added complexion.”
The trend: Smudged cat-eye liner
His take: “Jamie Chung is the type of person, since I know her so personally despite the fact that I've never met her, who would look good after a four-hour hot yoga session. She's naturally beautiful and, when you’re looking at her, you don't even realize the effect of the eyeliner. It seems minimal, but it adds a ton of depth to her look.”
The trend: French braid
His take: “Women may be a huge fan of the man bun, but this is the type of hair guys dig on girls. Well, at least, this guy.”
The trend: Sleek, polished hair & glowy makeup
His take: “She's a gorgeous woman, so I'm not sure why she took this route. Her hair looks like a balding 58-year-old’s who refuses to accept the fact that he is indeed balding, so he does the thin hair combover. And her makeup might need some blotting with a tissue.”
The trend: Topknot bun
His take: “I was not aware that this was called a topknot bun, but that's besides the point. There's not a hair out of place. Not one! It's a polished look that's great for the office, a first date, or, you know, an exclusive red carpet event.”
The trend: Smoky eyes & pink lips
His take: “Like Jaime King, Iggy Azalea also does not have one hair out of place! Remarkable. The lipstick is on-point and really makes them look full, exquisite, and, uh, what was I talking about again? Her makeup is clean, but a little too clean. It gives off a stringent Russian soldier vibe.”
The trend: Neon eye makeup
His take: “She definitely got a lot of attention when she stepped out the door, but not for the right reasons. We've seen a ton of great eye makeup styles and colors, but this is not one of them. Stay away from the highlighters, Rita Ora.”
The trend: Deep side part
His take: “She's adorable, and this turns up the adorableness one giant notch. I also have a side part, so I'm all for fellow parters. Additionally, her hairstyle gives us mere mortals a chance to gaze at those giant diamond earrings.”
The trend: Raspberry lipstick
His take: “I'm a big fan of red lipstick on women, and Emmy Rossum's shade contrasts nicely with her darker hair and eyebrow color. As soon as you look at her—boom!—her lips immediately become the focal point. Just one thing—this may be nitpicky, and it may be due to the way she's smiling—but that spot on her bottom lip makes it looks like she didn't get a chance to finish putting the lipstick on. Come on, Emmy/Emmy's makeup artist(s)! (So nitpicky.)”
Do you agree or disagree with any of his opinions? Let us know in the comments and be sure to check out JackThreads!